Memory in objects
（続き）
The music used for the slides was
chairhouse
The Trembling Living Wire Of Those Unusual Strings - #3791 (745 Left)
SoundCloud
When I was in the early years of primary school, my mother used to write the date of purchase on the new dining table and chairs and stick them up. She just stuck them on with cellophane tape, so they would eventually peel off. I remember picking up a few small pieces of paper that had turned yellow. Nevertheless, my mother would put a new piece of paper back on again. I never knew where she checked the date of purchase.
At the age of 24 I left home and got married before I turned 25. After I left home, my parents' house was redecorated and the old furniture was renewed. Did she put a piece of paper with the date on it as well?
After my father's death, my mother left the house as it was and moved into an independent care flat. Years after my mother's death, I hired a contractor to empty my parents' house. There is no way to check anymore if there were pieces of paper on the furniture to date the purchase, as there used to be.
The MD player, which no longer works, is overlaid with memories of the disaster some 30 years ago. My daughter, who was in primary school, started learning to play the flute around that time and used her first flute until she graduated from junior high school. After my wife's death, I was sorting through her belongings and came across a photograph of my daughter at a junior high school athletics marching session. It was taken by my wife. I only went to see her in the first grade and she was still not marching at that time. I never actually saw the scene as my wife took it. I think my daughter said that she did not follow my wife's vague dream (that she wanted her to go on to music college) and that she would only enjoy music as a hobby.The second flute was in high school. It is far more expensive than the first one. She still has it with her, but she cannot play it in her room where she lives alone because she says that when she plays it, it knocks back through the wall next door. She no longer seems to be able to enjoy the piano, flute or guitar, even as hobbies.
Objects hold a variety of memories.
But the memories are not shared, and with my death, these things will become junk to be disposed of.
Even this beautiful silicone doll.
私が小学校の低学年の時、母は新しく買った食卓や椅子に購入した日付を書いて貼っていた。セロハンテープで貼っているだけだから、その内に剥がれ落ちてゆくのだが。黄変した小さな紙きれを何度か拾ったのを覚えている。それでも母はまた新しく紙切れを張りなおす。購入した日付をどこで確認しているのか私には分からなかった。
24歳で私は家を出て、25歳になる前に結婚した。私が家を出た後、実家は内装をやり直しして、古い家具も新しくなった。それにも日付を書いた紙きれを貼っていたのだろうか。
父の死後、母は家をそのまま残して、自立支援型介護付き老人マンションに入居した。母の死後、何年か経って、私は業者に依頼して実家の中を空っぽにした。昔のように、購入の日付を記す紙切れが家具にあったのかどうか、もう確認のしようがない。
動かなくなったMDプレイヤーには30年ほど前の震災の記憶が重なる。小学生だった娘は、その前後からフルートを習い始め、最初のフルートは中学校卒業まで使っていた。妻の死後、遺品を整理していて、中学校の体育会のマーチングでの娘の写真が出てきた。妻が写したもの。私は一年生の時に見に行っただけで、その頃は未だマーチンをしていなかった。妻が撮ったような場面は実際には見ていない。娘は、妻の漠然とした夢、音大へ進んで欲しいという希望には沿わず、音楽はあくまでも趣味として楽しむと言った気がする。2本目のフルートは高校に入ってから。最初のものよりも遥かに高価なもの。それを今でも手元に置いているようだが、一人住まいの部屋でそれを吹くと、隣に住む人が壁をどんどんと叩いてくるとのことで、吹くことができない。ピアノもフルートもギターも、趣味としても、もう楽しむことは出来ないようだ。
物には様々な記憶が宿っている。
しかし、その記憶は共有されることはなく、私の死と共に、これらのものは処分すべきガラクタとなる。
この美しいシリコンドールも。
